Who are you?
Who are you really?
Who are you at your core?
Does this identity define your daily actions?
This subject is one that I return to time and time again…when I need to reflect on what I am doing in my life. So I will flick the concept over to you today!
To help you out, let’s use myself as the example as I really am my own point of reference hey?
Oh, and before I start – yes, you and I have a stack of identities in our lives. Right now – I am a mum, business owner, writer, coach, strategic responder (feels like it recently!), mentor, cleaner, daughter, sister, friend, negotiator, leader, trainer, neighbour and probs other things.
It is, however, what we ‘believe’ about the identity – that creates our daily actions.
Let’s delve a bit more, shall we?
I believe that a ‘mum’ does the following things:
* Cares and loves
* Provides shelter/food/clothes/internet!
* Listens and provides advice
* Leads in a positive way
So, for me this stuff is naturally the way I act, do and behave as a mum. These beliefs provide me with the daily actions required as a mum.
As I know it.
And, for me – it works. Notice how I say ‘for me’ as we are all different right? No judgment at all. This identity as a ‘mum’ works for me and I’ll run with it.
I will give you another example to help you understand this concept. (By the way, I am not saying you don’t…it’s always good to hear this shit in a different way hey?)
My identity as a writer. I believe a writer does the following:
* Writes daily
* Talks about writing
* Reads (a lot!)
Knowing this enables me to ensure that my daily habits consist of at least one of these tasks. I’d say that every day I am writing ‘something’. Either content for a blog, someone else’s blog, my new book or in my journal. I also read daily – so much so that I put a 20 min timer on my phone to ensure I don’t get carried away!
So, what I am saying is:
My identity as a writer = my daily tasks
So let’s flick it back to you. What is one of your identities?
My suggestion is that you grab a pen and paper and write down your identities, then what you believe about them. This ensures you are doing the tasks associated with that identity.
It’s an interesting task when you do it…as I am sure that you will find there are incongruencies. And that’s totes ok…you are human after all…BUT! just being aware will help you re-associate what you need to DO.
This is the ‘be, do, have’, model.
Who are you BEING?
What are you DOING?
To HAVE the outcome you want?
Consider this for a moment.
We tend to flip it the other way around don’t we? We start with the outcome in mind and then think ‘what do I need to do to get that?’
What if you started with BE? Who do you need to be to get x, y or z?
I’d love to know your thoughts on this. Can you change your thoughts to who you are being to get the result you are looking for?